LeCrust

French pizza? French bread pizza? The Ninja susses out a slice from the “secret” menu at LeBus.

Pop-quiz, hotshot. It’s Thursday night, you’ve blown your deadlines for a new pizza review and the newspaper editors are breathing down your neck. To make matters worse, the city has just been hit with a flash snow storm, quickly scattering any hopes of travel and any remaining pizza plans you had in place. What do you do?

If you’re the Ninja, you do what you always do in a snow storm: throw on some winter gear, your boots, and walk to the nearest bar for a drink. In this case, LeBus of East Falls.

So here we are, the December 2018 edition of the East Falls Pizza Review, where this month, the Ninja will be enjoying pizza from LeBus. “LeBus? Pizza?” you say. Well, not really, but also, sort of…read on to find out.

LeBus is located at the intersection of Ridge & Midvale in the heart of East Falls. The brainchild of local resident David Braverman, LeBus serves eclectic mix of brunch, lunch and dinner offerings using locally sourced and healthy ingredients as well as the famous LeBus fresh baked breads. “But Ninja, pizza? Does it actually have pizza? This is a pizza review after all. “Don’t Shan Chuan us,” you say.

Yes, this is a pizza review. Yes, Le Bus has pizza — if you are under the age of 12. It’s $5, 4 slices and it’s on the kids’ menu. It’s amazing.

The Ordering Experience (N/A)

To keep things fair, I am not scoring the ordering experience for Le Bus. For one, they don’t appear to deliver or be on any food delivery apps. For two, you could hypothetically get carry out, but the Ninja dined in for this review, and rating a dining in experience would open a whole new can of worms.  For three, can you order carryout for a kids’ menu item? The kids’ menu isn’t even listed on their website. Who knows, but the Ninja will probably attempt it at one point. Suffice to say, the service was great, and the pizza came out quickly and hot.

Your options for ordering are:

  1. Order over the phone and pickup/carryout at the restaurant, create some story about how your child is waiting in the car.
  2. Eat at the restaurant with a child or borrow a child from your neighbor.

The Ninja had a 6:30 reservation and was seated promptly. The pizza came out very quickly after being ordered, before any of the other food that was ordered for the Ninja’s family. A perk of ordering food off of the children’s menu no doubt. Little did Le Bus know that this child-sized pizza was headed for a Ninja-sized stomach.

The Pizza Experience

Presentation (2 out of 5)

Similiar to the previously reviewed In Riva this is a TINY pizza. Smaller than In Riva’s offering. Officially the smallest pizza in East Falls currently. The plate is nice. The pizza isn’t much to look at, and is actually a bit sloppy. It appears to be slightly undercooked at first look, the Ninja likes to see a bit more of a golden hue to his cheese, but let’s take a bite and find out.

Cheese (4.95 out of 5)

Wow, despite the amount of cheese and the temperature it was baked to, it has a nice snap to it. And the taste, it’s so rich and creamy, without being too heavy and overbearing. The waiter, when asked what type of cheese it was, simply replied that it was mozzarella. The inquisitive look on his face said more than if he had vocalized his thoughts – “why is this grown man eating his child’s dinner?” Ninja deducts .5 for the amount of cheese and the bake level.

Sauce (5 out of 5)

This is where things get interesting. The sauce immediately hits you in the face with full on garlic flavor. There are tons of pieces of fresh diced garlic laden throughout the sauce. The sauce is bold, fresh, and above all else, garlicky. Dare I say this is almost a garlic sauce. The Ninja wonders if this is a sauce Le Bus uses in an adult dish and merely appropriates for the kid’s pizza.

Crust (5 out of 5)

Remember the famous LeBus baked goods mentioned earlier in the review? Famous LeBus pizza crust is more like it. This item is billed on the kids’ menu as ‘French Bread Pizza’ — and they were not kidding. The mouth feel of this crust is literally melt in your mouth. Fresh, warm, buttery, it’s a 10 out of 10. Or a 5 out of 5 on this rating scale. Whatever.

Conclusion 

With 1 slice to go after consuming the first 3, the Ninja leaned over to his daughter and said “You just don’t understand this. There is no way you can appreciate what is going on here with this pizza,” and he was right.

For one, this was such a delightfully complex and nuanced pizza, between the garlic in the sauce, to the French bread crust, to the cheese, this was not merely a children’s pizza. For two, the Ninja ate the whole thing and his daughter was left to order a different item off of the children’s menu, cheeseburger sliders.

LeBus, give us an adult version pizza, and give us an adult version NOW.

 

 

Born in Chicago, arguably the capitol of world class pizza options, the Pizza Ninja consumes pizza an average of 3 to 4 nights a week. From local options to frozen pizza, no crust is left behind. He has been eating pizza for 34 years and currently resides in East Falls along with his wife, daughter and two dogs. On occasion, he will graciously share a slice of his pizza with them. Follow the Ninja on Instagram.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.